1. If you spin an oriental man in a circle does he become disoriented?
2. One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor....
3. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.
4. The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live.
5. I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, "Where's the self-help section?" She said if she told me, it would defeat the purpose.
6. What if there were no hypothetical questions?
7. If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it a hostage situation?
8. Is there another word for synonym?
9. Where do forest rangers go to "get away from it all?"
10. What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an endangered plant?
11. If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages?
12. Would a fly without wings be called a walk?
13. If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked?
14. Can vegetarians eat animal crackers?
15. If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent?
16. Why do they put Braille on drive-through bank machines?
17. What was the best thing before sliced bread?
18. One nice thing about egotists: They don`t talk about other people.
19. Does the Little Mermaid wear an algaebra?
20. How is it possible to have a civil war?
21. If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest drown too?
22. If you ate both pasta and antipasto, would you still be hungry?
23. If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done?
24. Whose idea was it for the word "lisp" to have an "S" in it?
25. Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them?
26. Why is there an expiration date on sour cream?
27. Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet the sweaty things.
28. Can an atheist get insurance against acts of God?